Yes I Am Still In Love With You
by Fiza Pathan
They say you don’t love me anymore, that your wedding has been announced for this day.
To your endless bounty with them shall I be in tune with their fleeting steps towards your happiness.
The holy minstrels will play their pipes while I decorate my sobbing eyes with the sacred kohl.
In its blackness I shall avoid your pretty face as you descend upon the altar of your nuptial tie
I’ll not look upon your kinsman whom you wed to my sorrow.
I’ll cut my ankles with the silver band of bells, I’ll chime with every step I take.
Outshine like a sharpened sword will I, grace this occasion in dance to your beginning dear and my ending.
The drummers beckons us to begin, towards the crescent moon do I take my eyes onto
There do I make sacrifice of my love upon its cosmic altar and as well sip away my blood to my toes.
Yes I am still in love with you my darling, though you are veiled yet you outshine the night.
I was to sway all around like the discus of the Holy One; to Him I was to pray that he may heed my plea.
It was not to happen I tore my rhythmic steps with the anklet, now the foot bleeds as it stabs to the fakir’s beat.
Yes I am still in love with you my lovely jasmine, your bridal guise makes me want to die with every red stained step I take.
The firecrackers burst out with a galaxy of stars into my decorated eyes, your forehead gleams brighter than this candle lit night.
The marble floor so beige earlier now is caked with your old lovers dull red footprints,
The drummer beats his veins to sweat I must go on swirling.
The guests shudder as they behold my yellow face all a glitter, happy am I if you are so
May this covenant last forever.
Twirling is the whole assembly to bid you the well wishes of this bond,
But all I see is a mix of revolving tears, that stain my black eye makeup into jet black rivulets down my pale cheeks,
Have you ever seen a more gallant dancer even in your dreams?
A white light of faint now dims me while the drummer’s banging echoes throughout my whole being
Jiggle I the peacock feathers in my hands, I know that the ceremony is at an end.
So you finally have wedded my most esteemed rival who was better than this wounded dancer could ever be.
But what the world still does not comprehend, that with every turn I take,
I call out your name in whispers to enchant your aura towards my wasting exterior,
I can’t rid myself of your love neither of this painful external nausea.
Now the scented rose petals have covered me with their chill, it’s time for you to leave me.
Blind in snowy whiteness, I can’t see a thing but I shall swirl forever more
Taunting your cold heart with my true blood, because you did not even allow me to vomit you from my memory.
Yes I am still in love, though you be another’s bride
Yes I still shall swirl to the beat of that wailing drum forever more in loves vertiginous curse.
Copyright © 2013 Fiza Pathan
Image courtesy: Google images for representation purpose only